IBW's Holiday Party & Dark Czech Lager Release Tomorrow 12/14!

"There's UFO's over New York and I ain't too surprised!"
- John Lennon, Nobody Told Me

Yes, it's true - as if it hasn't been for a very long time - there are indeed UFO's over New York... and Pennsylvania... and Connecticut... and Maryland... and an Air Force base in Germany as well! And, at least at the time I am writing this (and to the best of my understanding), nobody has a solid explanation for what these little buggers are.

Folks are calling them "drones", but that doesn't seem to actually be the case. The only reason anyone is calling them "drones" is to induce a calming trance of familiarity and put people back to sleep. But, the fact remains, there's been a staggering amount of reports of these things and NO ONE is claiming to know what they are or what exactly they are doing.

We know at this point they aren't Iran's. And no other foreign state is claiming ownership either. That isn't to say that they are from the Sirius star system or Zeta Reticula but, wait: stop and sit in this for a minute,  no one knows what they are and why they are here. It's a lot like the human race itself, really.

This level of ignorance about a multi-state event is pretty rare in this age when everybody is an expert about everything (and so, nothing). We haven't seen something so comprehensively opaque as this since the Tyson fight or the second season of Twin Peaks. I for one am enjoying the hell out of the confusion.

Anyway, enjoy this strange noise while it's here. This too will be resolved and answered to a greater or lesser degree of satisfaction before too long.

While you're indulging in this revelry of confusion, get into that closet of yours and dust off your Ugly Christmas sweater as tomorrow, SATURDAY DECEMBER 14TH, we have our IBW HOLIDAY PARTY! We're releasing a Dark Czech Lager made in collaboration with Chicago rockers BEGIN BY GATHERING SUPPLIES. We'll have the beer on draft and available in 4-packs and BBGS are playing a set around 9pm. There's other great bands bands, too, including REGAL MACHINES (from WI) and an incredible guitarist Pennington Markowski. The music starts, low key, around 8pm and will be all up in your business by 9 or 9:30p.

Prior to that, starting around 5pm, we've got tons of stuff to get you into the seasonal mood. Stuff like Pizza from PizzaDom, a table-side magician, gift giving from Santa and an Ugly Sweater contest. Bring a canned good and get a raffle ticket to win a gift from our own low-rent version of Santa Claus. Or get your photo with the old boy in front of a slightly realistic holiday scene hanging on our garage door.

It'll be another great party. Come on over tomorrow and unwindulax a bit from this increasingly unnerving world by knocking glasses (full of Dark Czech Lager please!) with your strange but true friends here at IBW.

Sunday, December 15th we have a little Dog & Cat Vendor Pop-Up so you can get all the gifts for the 4-legged champ in your life. And PLEASE bring your furry buddies with you! It's one of my favorite joys in this odd tragedy we call life that I get to meet everybody's awesome dogs and cats. We're opening early on Sunday so we can get right down to it. Doors will be unlocked at noon by one JOHN VERNON FORBES and the rest is a choose your own adventure with very low stakes. We've even got a little acoustic duo wrapping up the day around 5pm.

And then - and I'm very excited for this - THE 1ST ANNUAL IBW CHILI COOK-OFF & COOKIE EXCHANGE is on Thursday December 19th!.

If you've got a chili recipe and want to compete, email info@ibw-chicago.com There are a couple seats left for the competition so don't dawdle.

Otherwise, if you don't want to show off your chili then just come on over here, drink beer and sample the chili and vote on it. You, YES YOU decide who will leave the Lodge with their tail between their legs that night. This doesn't cost you anything, just bring your big hungry mouth and a strong opinion. YOU CAN DO IT!

And then, once everybody is good and loaded up on beans, DJ FARTBRITCHES (better known as Jen from Bucket O Blood books and records) is going to spin a LIVE SOUNDTRACK to the Peabody Award Winning Documentary SANTA CLAUS vs THE DEVIL!

If you don't know SANTA CLAUS vs THE DEVIL you are in for a treat. If you do know it, you've got to be prettay prettay excited for this. Here's the run down:  
 

Santa Claus works in outer space and battles with a demon named Pitch, sent to Earth by Lucifer to ruin Christmas by killing Santa and "making all the children of the Earth do evil".


This is going to be an epic evening, not to be missed!!

We've released pre-orders for the highly coveted WAR ON XMAS BOX SETS on our webstore at www.ibw-chicago.com and....yup! These will be available for PICK-UP ONLY after December 16th. But get your dibs on one now for a little less $$.

 2025 CULT MEMBERSHIP purchases are NOW available on that same before-mentioned webstore. We're limiting our memberships to only 75 cult members this year, so act early and act fast, you don't want to miss out on that.

What do you get for your Cult Membership? So much, I tell you. Things like:

  • A super secret Initiation ceremony into one of the world's most ELITE cabals!

  • Private Parties for Cult Members Only!

  • Monthly Cult Meetings with beer specials and food!

  • Cult Member only Shirts! Hoodies! Enamel Pins! Sundry!

  • Heresy!

  • Cult Member only outings!!!

  • Help design and BREW our annual CULT BEER with brewers Brian & Matt!

  • Degeneracy! Depravity! Enlightenment in THIS lifetime!

The IBW Cult Membership is the perfect gift for that wayward wandering soul in your life and/or JUST the thing you need to finally put that final nail in the coffin of your life on the path of the straight & narrow. 

Also... ALL DECEMBER we have a special in the Lodge: BUY $100 on a gift card and receive a FREE $25 addition to that card! You can get that $25 added to your card or get it on a second card and keep the money for yourself. It's entirely up to you!

I know it's hard, but we're trying to give you as many reasons as possible to leave your damn house. 

Hopefully we'll see some of you tomorrow!!!


You can see all of our events on our event calendar athttps://www.ibw-chicago.com/events

You can see what's currently on tap at IBW LODGE #1 at https://www.ibw-chicago.com/whats-on-tap

2025 CULT MEMBERSHIPS are LIVE & BLECH FRIDAY SPECIALS

Happy BLECH FRIDAY!

I'm sure you all are busy punching people at Wal-Mart to insure you secure that last remaining Trump Beanie Baby, but, on the slim chance you might be at home sleeping off your Thanksgiving hang-over, I wanted to plug you into the fact that 2025 CULT MEMBERSHIPS ARE NOW AVAILABLE!

Your sleek and vigilant 2025 CULT MEMBERSHIP can now be purchased at our state-of-no-art webstore. We're limiting our memberships to only 75 cult members this year, so act early and act fast, you don't want to miss out on that.

What do you get for your Cult Membership? So much, I tell you. Things like:

  • A super secret Initiation ceremony into one of the world's most ELITE cabals!

  • Private Parties for Cult Members Only!

  • Monthly Cult Meetings with beer specials and food!

  • Cult Member only Shirts! Hoodies! Enamel Pins! Sundry!

  • Heresy!

  • Cult Member only outings!!!

  • Help design and BREW our annual CULT BEER with brewers Brian & Matt!

  • Degeneracy! Depravity! Enlightenment in THIS lifetime!

The IBW Cult Membership is the perfect gift for that wayward wandering soul in your life and/or JUST the thing you need to finally put that final nail in the coffin of your life on the path of the straight & narrow. 

To celebrate this lovely day(s) of excessive credit card leveraging, we are offering a 10% discount on our SECRET CHIEF memberships now until Monday night. To get this you must put SECRET10 in the discount code section when you check out.

We also have WAR ON XMAS box sets available for PRE-ORDER for $55 right now at that same, troubling webstore. These are a fantastic gift and a fantastic price. PRE-ORDER cost will go up to $60 on Tuesday, so pick yours up now.

We are also offering a 20% discount on our 3 YEAR ANNIVERSARY shirts now until Monday night. 

To secure this super-sexy nod to SPACEMEN 3 and celebrating our 3 years of running a moderately failing store front you must enter the code BLECHBLAH20 at check-out.

We open at noon today so you can keep that patriotic bender going. Just think, you won't have to regret anything for a whole extra day if you just come into IBW LODGE #1 right at noon and really lean into your troubles.

Oh, also, this Sunday, come feel the heat of another FREE LIVE SHOW at IBW Lodge #1 when GRANDMA & GRANDPA study your low expectations and put them to music. The show starts at 3:30pm and John Vernon Forbes will be on hand to give you a hand with your beer.

I know it's hard, but we're trying to give you as many reasons as possible to leave your damn house. 

Hopefully we'll see some of you lovely creeps soon!

Dark Matter Coffee MURDER BINGO and more @ IBW Lodge #1!

Greetings humans!

Now that the long National nightmare of respect, civility and decorum is finally put to bed, we can get back to the important work of coping!

And we've got coping mechanisms in spades here at IBW.

I'm very excited to announce that DARK MATTER COFFEE is sponsoring our MURDER BINGO for November and they've brought tons of great treats to punch up your horror movie experience. Each first bingo of the week wins a pound of Dark Matter coffee and the grand prize for the month is suhhh-weeet. Remember, to win the Grand Prize you must score the most Bingos which mean... you have to play to win.

We've also got some great food pop-ups for November and some amazing bands.

Tonight we've got our FRANKENSTEIN THURSDAY with 1L of Trust and Orange Sunshine for $10 and a local small business LIL GREEK KITCHEN slinging delicious greek food for your mouth eating pleasures.

FRIDAY, HAPPY LOBSTER FOOD TRUCK is back from 5pm to 8pm slinging their hot & buttered lobster rolls!

This Saturday, our favorite PHISH tribute band is giving you a FREE SHOW for your spaghetti dancing pleasures. They'll get started around 10pm, so get out here and do what you must do!

Next Thursday we have the November edition of the ELASTIC TELEPATHIC WORKSHOP! If you're a mildly capable musician and you have the gear to play with other amplified musicians, come on down and put your balls out there (even if you don't have any balls, put your proverbial balls in the pit). This is a ton of fun and we've got some very good players to make the rest of us look better.

I know, I know, the poster say Nov 21st, but we had to change the date and I didn't want Mr. Forbes to have to redo a whole new poster. Deal with it! Or don't, but don't make me hear about it, por favor.

And then Saturday, November 16th we've got a great female folk rock duo, THE DEVIL SAYS JUMP, and a food pop-up from CHEF KYLE bringing you fresh Hawaiian fusion like Poke and Musubi.

Here's the full line-up for food pop-ups and trucks for the month. 

I know it's hard, but we're trying to give you as many reasons as possible to leave your damn house. 

Hopefully we'll see some of you lovely creeps soon!


"IBW: We're here for you as long as you have cash."